Who says you can't be a sexually aggressive woman and still get ahead?

Jennifer Gearey, the new director of communications for Defence Minister Peter MacKay, wrote sex advice columns. (Twitter)

From the article Jennifer Gearey Was Sex Advice Columnist Before Joining Peter MacKay's Staff we really liked the following: 

Two sex advice columns she wrote in 2007 caught our eye.

"How to Make Her ‘O-My’! In Sex Easy Steps" was published in Urban Male Magazine (UMM) in the fall of 2007.

That year, she also wrote "Rubbing Your Man the Right Way." The piece, which was published in Bobbi magazine, includes tips on how to "blow your partner away", including enjoying "enjoy your man like a damn good ice cream cone with a mouth watering cherry that you keep going back for more of."

When it comes to advice for men, though, Gearey, a mother of three who is now married to MacKay’s former chief of staff, John MacDonell, shares tips on:

– Masturbation: "If you really want to spoil her, treat your hunney to a special new sex toy — and don’t feel threatened, these playthings will never replace your studly self."

– Talking dirty: "During the course of a day, call or email your partner and tell her all the things you want to do to her when you get home. Build up her sexual expectations and when you finally see her there will be little time for anything other than her warm jeans pressed up against you and her nails running eagerly down your back."

– Touching your woman: "Be gentle, start with her erogenous zones — kiss her neck, nibble at her thigh, or take a shower together and put some kink under the water by offering a shave à la Brazilian perhaps."

– And what to do post-sex: “Most girls don’t need to be cradled after a romp in the hay, that’s a misconception. Like you, we could probably go for a three-tower falafel sandwich and perhaps even a snooze.”

A Hundred Orgasms A Day - Extraordinary People

I just watched that whole thing...Now I'm going to go have a few of my own, hello, vibrator!

51 Christian Phrases For Anal Sex

51 Christian Phrases For Anal Sex

Have Obligatory Sex by 'Dead Logging': A Quick and Dirty Guide

Have Obligatory Sex by 'Dead Logging': A Quick and Dirty Guide

Now that most of us have confessed that we all have obligatory sex sometimes -- I even managed to give you a breakdown of the steps involved -- you'll need the perfect sex position to pull it off. Sorry if that sounded like a bad pun.

That's where dead logging comes in. Haven't heard of it? You know it more than you think. While it often means something bad -- i.e., having sex with someone who's passed out -- we're here to tell you that dead logging can be a deliberate move on the part of the woman, or the man for that matter. Here's what happens after the lights go down and you've decided that putting out is the only way to make your partner stop hounding you. Read on for A Guide to Dead Logging. You might want to lie down for this.

Step 1: Climb into bed after agreeing to obligatory sex. If the deep sighing and eye rolling haven't turned your partner off, proceed to Step 2.

Step 2: Lie down on the bed as frumpily as possible. This is NOT the time to preen or look sexy -- make sure all your rolls are all over the place. If you have no rolls, pretend. Also: bite me.

Step 3: Sigh deeply again. Perhaps THIS will tell your partner you're so not into it. If your partner persists, go on to Step 4.

Step 4: Remove pants or allow your partner to remove your pants. Do not show any sort of emotion -- grunt, do not groan. Groaning may be deemed as "sexy."

Step 5: Begrudgingly allow your partner to mount you. This is very important -- do not move your legs or hips to allow for easier access.

Step 6: When sex begins, imagine yourself a tree. A dead tree. Lying in the riverbank.

Step 7: Do not giggle at the mental image of your partner having sex with a tree.

Step 8: Ensure that no noise, unless it is a deliberate sigh, comes out of your mouth during this encounter. You're a dead log, not an active partner! You're just supposed to lie there.

Step 9: Begin to replay The Godfather (or Casino) in your mind. This may be especially important if your partner has a hard time finishing or seems insistent that the sex be good for you.

Step 10: Try not to guffaw at the sex faces your partner makes. Also: do not check your email. You're a dead log, remember? You just have to wait until the whole damn thing is over so you can roll over and go to sleep.

Have you ever 'dead-logged' the way we've described it here when you've unwillingly agreed to obligatory sex? 'Fess up!

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Image via kevmann16/Flickr

Filed Under: sex

Do You Have A Special Mix List For Your Sexy Time?

Do You Have A 'SPECIAL' Mix List For Your Sexy Time?


I remember dating someone that would always play a 'SPECIAL' mix of songs when we were getting busy.

image source: ALIEN FAILURE

Luckily for me I liked most of the songs, and he'd would put them on shuffle, so that it was different each time.

Do you have a 'SPECIAL' list of songs that you or your partner use?

Share your 'SPECIAL' mix list in a comment below!

Why Your New Year's Resolution Should Involve Sex

Every year we make resolutions. And every year they are boring. Lose weight. Pay off the credit cards. Eat better. Stop smoking. Exercise. Blah blah blah. Can we please stop kidding ourselves here and instead focus on what really matters?

Sex. That's what matters, and none of us are having enough of it, are we? And if we are, we can always have more, right? Besides, if our New Year's Resolution for 2012 is about having more sex, all those other resolutions are actually being accomplished as well. Don't believe me? Here's proof:

Sex burns calories -- 150 to 250 per half hour. So if you have more sex, it's like exercise. Get healthy, lose weight! Now you just got to get him to last more than 15 minutes since that's only around 75 to 125 calories. You know what you can eat that is 75 calories? Nothing good.

Sex keeps you from using your credit cards because you're too busy getting it on to get to the mall. Unless of course you're paying for sex. In which case I hope your hooker has a 3-hour minimum so at least you can be working off a hearty meal.

Sex makes you hungry. Oh it doesn't make you hungry? Well good. Then you will lose weight during your romp and not pile it back on after. If it does make you hungry like it does me, just make sure to grab something healthy. Or go ahead and eat the brownie because you just burned some calories. Refer to the amount of time you got it on and calculate how much you can eat. Or get a hooker.

Sex gets rid of stress. It releases endorphins and puts you in a good mood -- it's the ultimate stress buster. We should all be in a better mood for 2012. Let's hope there is less stabby stuff and more happy stuff. Plus less stress will help you live longer, letting you love longer. And less stress, less smoking. Unless of course you smoke to stop stress. If you do that, you are killing yourself with each cigarette, haven't you seen those ads? So stop it.

Sex will bring you and your partner closer. Everyone is happy when getting it on! Love love! Unless of course one of you has that hooker problem. Then you're just screwed.

Will you New Year's Resolution involve more sex?

Image via DavidMartynHunt/Flickr

ABOUT THE AUTHORMichele Zipp 

loves vintage and will defend skinny jeans to the death though she is highly superstitious and "death" is probably a bad word choice. She has a touch of the hoarding disease and enjoys sleuthing, the worst reality shows, and wearing high heels, even at the playground. She's an AP mom of twins, slightly crunchy but with a pedicure.

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Study: When women have rights, everyone gets laid more

Straight men of the world, there is a new solution to that age-old problem, how to have more sex? It's simple — just strive to ensure that your female counterparts have fulfilling jobs, equal chance for advancement, no glass ceilings, and receive equal pay for equal work. (And you thought foreplay took a long time!)

A new study from the American Psychological Association says people have more sex in countries where there is a greater degree of gender equality. The study, conducted in thirty-seven countries using over 300,000 couples, is based on a theory of "sexual economics." Essentially, it treats sex like currency and breaks it down into supply and demand.

Since men want sex, on average, more than women do, sex is a more valuable asset for a woman than it is for a man. In other words, a woman can use sex to get ahead in way that men can't. In a repressive society, sex is a woman's only asset, and so it becomes "expensive." However, when she has lots of different ways to get ahead (like college or art-rock), sex becomes "cheaper." As the study's author says:

If women don't have many opportunities to make money on their own, they need the value of sex to be as high as possible... When women don't have other opportunities, sex is the main thing she has to offer.

It's a clever — if not exactly sexy — way of looking at global sexual politics. And, at least anecdotally, it rings true. (Likelihood of getting laid on vacation: Iran vs. Holland? No contest.)

Feminism — it's win/win.  Read more at www.nerve.com

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How to have a delicious sex life

Great sex is like a great stew Credits: Chef Therese Nelson

Having great sex is a lot like making a great stew.  Sure, you can get the Dinty Moore pre-made kind in a can.  But it will be nowhere near as satisfying as the kind that is made from scratch using fresh ingredients.  The recipe is pretty simple.  You gather your basic ingredients:  meat, vegetables, seasonings and water.  You will then prep those ingredients, bring them quickly to a boil, reduce to a simmer for a while (tasting and adjusting your seasonings along the way) and enjoy your delicious, slow-cooked stew.

The meat of you sex life is your physical being.  It should go without saying that you should be as physically fit and attractive as you would expect your partner to be.  Attention to hygiene and grooming are important since the quality of the sex is directly tied to the level of physical attraction the parties involved have to each other.  To take it a step farther, there is nothing wrong with catering a bit to your partner’s preferences.  If you know that he/she likes a certain cologne or a certain outfit or a certain hairstyle, it’s very grown and sexy to be responsive to that.  You eat with your eyes first, just like you do with food.

The vegetables of your sex life are what makes it healthy and nutritious. Your attitude toward sex is important.  Do you look at it as sharing or do you look at it as a responsibility?  Worse yet, do you look at sex as a tool to be used to manipulate your partner?  Sex is the physical manifestation of how you feel about your partner.  It is the expression of the regard (or lack thereof) with which you hold him/her. Safe sex is important.  Get tested and know your status.  For that matter, go get tested together.  Discussion of your sexual history can be awkward but no one is asking (or should be asking) for charts and graphs.  But you are right to be concerned with someone who refuses to discuss their sexual history.  Birth control is a shared responsibility and it is important to be aware of what steps are being taken to prevent unwanted pregnancy.  Condoms are just the minimum.

Creativity, spontaneity and an open mind are the spices that add flavor the stew that is your sex life.  Here’s where you can get as exotic as you wish and why one couple’s “stew” might not taste like another couple’s “stew”.  Sex is fun and is an opportunity to try new things.  Activities like role-playing, impromptu quickies and sexy emails throughout the day keep things interesting.  The excitement of not knowing what is coming next is a big aphrodisiac and a well planned seduction is a good thing.

Water or broth is what melds the flavors of the meat, vegetables and seasoning together into the stew.  Communication and respect are the broth in which your sex life simmers and is important to all aspects of intimacy.  Openly sharing you feelings about the physical, mental and emotional aspects of your  relationship increases the level of intimacy and fuels passion.  It is important to respect each other and to care about you mutual satisfaction.  Two people working to please each is a win-win in most cases.

In preparing your stew it is important to select ingredients that work well together and that are pleasing to you.  If, for instance, intelligence is important to you but you ignore that to choose someone who is hung like a horse (or has a mouth like a vacuum cleaner as the case may be), you set yourself up for a poor quality meal down the road.

Just as you initially bring your bring your pot to a boil when making stew, so it is important to make it hot early in the relationship.  In the beginning you want to set the tone and hold your partner’s attention.  The way you interact sexually from the beginning gives you a place from which to build and grow as you relationship develops.

As it simmers, you taste your stew and adjust the seasoning as needed.  Sometimes you need more physical variety. This can be achieved with a change of  scenery, like a weekend getaway or having sex someplace you don't ordinarily have it.  Or perhaps trying a romantic game, reading erotica to each other or watching an adult film will spark new ideas to spice things up.  A low steady heat ensures that your stew cooks at a pace that allows the flavors to develop fully and the meat and vegetables to be nice and tender.  If you tend your stew carefully and season it properly, it will be satisfying, fulfilling and will taste better every time you have some.  Bon apetit!

Traci Adedeji , Rochester Sex & Relationships Examiner Read more at www.examiner.com

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Hey Guys, Do You Know The Way? Understanding The Clitoris

Understanding The Clitoris

Credit: iStockPhoto.com

If we told you that there was a way to make a woman putty in your hands, would you listen? Guess what, guys: We've figured out exactly what it takes to satisfy your woman -- in the bedroom at least. You might think that a few kisses and the presentation of your proud erect member might be enough to make her quiver, but you might be missing the most important factor in your, and your woman's, sexual satisfaction. Women have so many erogenous zones that it can get a little overwhelming for a guy trying to figure out the magic combination to her satisfaction. You've already gotten a play-by-play overview of the most popular -- her G-spot -- so now it's time to fully consider the never-fail, go-to spot for her orgasm. It's time to focus on the most important square inch on her body: her clitoris. Understanding the clitoris is the key to a woman eager to come back for more. Get comfortable and pay attention, here's everything you need to know when it comes to understanding the clitoris. about the clitoris Just in case you need a refresher course, here are the basic facts: Her clitoris is a small bud-like formation that is located slightly above the opening to her vagina, at the top of her inner labia. Clitoris size and shape differs from woman to woman, but it is generally between 1/8 to 3/8 of an inch in size. Her clitoris is the equivalent of your penis; it's packed with nerve endings and becomes engorged when she's aroused. Vital info: The vast majority of women require clitoral stimulation to achieve orgasm -- penetration just isn't always enough on its own. Sounds like a good enough reason to make its acquaintance, doesn't it? how to play with it Language Sexual stimulation is largely a cerebral activity for women; turning her on requires attention to her brain, not just her body. Even if you and your woman have yet to venture into talking dirty to each other, rest assured that whispering in her ear about what you plan on doing to her, or how turned on you are, can be enough to get her wanting more. The more aroused you can get her before the clothes come off, the easier your next job will be and this is key to understanding the clitoris. Fingers It goes without saying that clean hands and neat fingernails are key if you plan on going exploring, but what you might not realize is that diving in and honing in on her clitoris to start with might not be your best plan of attack. Your fingers are nimble: use them to your advantage. Stroke her thighs on your way and caress the areas on either side of her clitoris, including her labia, before gently making the first contact. A lot of women may find direct pressure uncomfortable, so try aiming just below or just above her clitoris and making small circular movements. Because the clitoris actually extends well into her entire pelvic region, rest assured that her enjoyment will only be enhanced by full manual coverage. Just a note on pressure: Be sure not to get too rough with her sensitive areas before you get to know what she likes and are clear on your understanding of the clitoris. A light touch will be more successful on most women, and those who need a little more are probably going to get frustrated with your restraint and beg for a harder touch. Sounds like a win-win situation to us. Understanding the clitoris can be fun and stimulating for you both... Read more at www.askmen.com

Weekday vs. Weekend Sex — Which Do You Prefer?

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Weekday vs. Weekend Sex — Which Do You Prefer?

If you're single, Wednesday night is the easiest time to find a "sexually available" mate, according to OKCupid's latest data analysis. The dating site says people out on Wednesday nights are more likely to rank casual sex as a romantic priority, be open to sex on the first date, and describe themselves as extroverted and adventurous. While news of a midweek flood of libertine singles is helpful information for people looking for last-minute love, it's also disappointing news for most adults, who apparently prefer having sex on the weekends.

A different study released today by sex toy sellers Adam and Eve found 30 percent of adults prefer sex on Saturday night, while 22 percent prefer Friday and 20 percent prefer Sunday. Wednesday is the most popular school night though, with 14 percent choosing that as their favorite night for sex. It is hump day after all. When it comes to scheduling your sex life, do you prefer getting busy on weekdays or weekends?

Weekday vs. Weekend Sex — Which Do You Prefer? Weekday — It's a relaxing way to mix up the work week. Weekend — I have more time.

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SPICE UP YOUR SEX LIFE --> CLICK

Adding Sex Furniture Can Add Spice To Any Relationship

Move over vibrators it seems that sex furniture is the new craze when it comes to sex toys.

With couples looking to spice up their relationships, some individuals feel that adding furniture that can help enhance their sex lives can help make a difference.

In order to determine your furniture needs you have to do your research. Depending on the type of experience you are looking for will determine the type of furniture you might be interested in. Websites like pinktrickle.com is a good place to start.

Sex furniture can consist of a striper pole, wedged adult pillows, a shower power bathtub handle, sex swings, inflatable sex machines, love and lounge chairs with remote control and much, much  more. Again, this is becoming a new way of looking at sex and enhancing a couple's sex life and taking it to an entirely new level.

When it comes to finding what will work for you, you may have to try several pieces of furniture before you figure out exactly what your particular needs are. Read more at www.examiner.com